Second-Guessing vs Grass is Greener on the Other Side

Second guess is defined as to question a decision or action that has already been completed. An example of second guess is when you make a decision and then you start to think about it a little more and decide another decision might have been better. Why do we, as seniors, find it necessary to second-guess ourselves so much in our later years?

Have you ever noticed that as we age, we find it harder and harder to make certain decisions and find ourselves putting things off because of one thing or another? I like to refer to this as second-guessing ourselves.

Are the decisions we make good things or should we be seeking another opinion on? And what if that other opinion differs from the decision we originally came up with?

Many of us, tend to say as we enter our twilight years, that getting old is not for sissies – usually based on problems with our health. Health problems, I can deal with. Usually with health problems the situation is that you either have a problem or you don’t, or you are told that in the near future, things are going to change and here is what you must do to be prepared for them. While we may not like it – hey – at our age, most of us try to roll with the punches and thus do what the doctor says.

Not so with the second-guessing type scenario. There is something you want to do that could possibly make your life better but there is that nagging question in the back of your head, will the change be for the better? We know that at our age nothing is guaranteed. The thought process is that hopefully, your life will change for the better but there is no guarantee hence the second-guessing and wondering if you are or will be doing the right thing.

This overall thought process raises so many questions, the main one being: Do we take the chance knowing that depending on what we eventually end up doing, we will have to live with the consequences as there will be no turning back. Or, do we withdraw into our shell like the turtle and say to ourselves – I know what I have in here – why risk it wondering if the grass will be greener on the other side?

I am sure those of you reading this are aware that “the grass is greener syndrome” means that individuals having this syndrome have an inability to feel content with their life as it is, and relentlessly seek something better.  Having made it to the grand old age of 78 soon to be 79, I feel certain that this dilemma happens just as much during our retirement years as it did during our working years and thus the reason for the article. Chances are that many of us senior citizens have been in this dilemma more times than we care to admit to and in each case, my guess is that there were always a couple of hiccups along the way to make the challenge even more interesting.   

Why the word hiccups – primarily because it is these hiccups that make us question our initial decision (you know the one that put us in this position in the first place, thinking that the grass may be greener on the other side), thus opening the door to second-guessing ourselves.  

So, the question becomes: At what point in one’s lives do we feel content with where we are in life and thus no longer have to second-guess decisions that we may or may not make. Decisions we consider to be relevant to our future well-being?  

Interesting dilemma, isn’t it?

Until next time!

Advertisements

Cooling Thoughts

One Day at a Time!

I have been reading selected readings from the Wit and Wisdom of Laura Ingalls Wilder and thought to myself that the knowledge imparted upon us in these short witticisms would also serve us well into our retirement years.  

“We would be much cooler and less tired if, instead of thinking of the weather and our weariness, we would try to remember the birds’ songs we heard in the early morning or notice the view of the woods and hills or of the valley and stream.”

I know that many of us like to think that we would not want to go back to the days of yesteryear, but after reading a passage like the above and then picturing in our minds the likes of which we see, hear, and read about today, one begins to wonder if the days of old with all the troubles they endured were as bad as some make them out to be.

Has the temperature changed over the years? Probably so. Do we get tired more quickly today than our forefathers might have? Again, probably so. But were we aware of all the problems of the world both here at home and abroad on a 24-hours a day/7days a week/52 weeks of the year basis? I think not. Chances are, that depending on where you were living, by the time you received the news of some disaster or calamity, it had been over and done with and people were getting on with their lives.

So, in reviewing the above writing, I contend that we would be wise to heed the words spoken in this passage by thinking more about the good things in life (birds singing early in the morning) and take notice of all the good things that surround  us (view of the woods and hills or the valley and stream). Chances are that we would no longer feel the unbearable heat from the sun nor notice how tired our bodies are from the work we do. Bottom line is that we would in all probability be thankful that we are alive and able to move about freely taking life one day at a time and enjoying the fact that while we woke up this morning, quite a few people were not as fortunate.

Until next time.

Every Day is an Adventure

Be adventurous!

“To me, it is a joy that “no man knoweth what a day may bring forth,” and that life is a journey from one discovery to another. It makes of every day a real adventure; and if things are not to my liking today, why, “There’s a whole day tomorrow that ain’t tetched yet,” as the old man said.”

And yet another of the wit and wisdom sayings of Laura Ingalls Wilder. How true is this statement? Should we wake up to unforeseen problems that we didn’t expect, well, we should just go about attending to them the best we can because no matter how tight we close our eyes, they will still be there when we open them. Best to tackle them now and be away with them because as was just recently mentioned “There’s a whole day tomorrow that ain’t tetched yet!” Chances are that it will be better than today.

Lessons that can be learned from this passage is that not every day is the same and as we all know – in life – there will be ‘ups and downs’ and so, if today is a ‘down’ type day – best we can do is face it, do what we can – and be done with it with the hope that tomorrow will be a better day.

We all have our own demons to deal with every day. It is how we deal with them that will make tomorrow a better day. We can face them and be done with them by day’s end, looking forward to a new start the next day, or we can  fuss and fume about them all day, subsequently carrying over the negative vibes to the next day and spoil whatever might have been waiting for us. There are reasons for the saying: “Tomorrow will be a better day!” I prefer the former of the two actions.

That’s my two cents and I am sticking with it.

Black Moon

Stay afraid, but do it anyway. What’s important is the action. You don’t have to wait to be confident. Just do it and eventually the confidence will follow.” ― Carrie Fisher

The above is a quote I came across while trying to figure out what I wanted to rant and rave about during this week’s post. I have been coming up empty regarding ideas to write about as I usually have a boatload of comical items to write about. But, with the negative news we continually read about and all the crap our country is going through, it is hard to get, let alone stay, in a comical mood. Enter the above quote which got me to thinking – something I am constantly doing – “hey, go through the wild and crazy news articles you read about each morning and find something wild and crazy to write about and just go for it.” As Carrie Fisher says above: “Stay afraid, but do it anyway.”

With that thought in mind, I decided to look at some of the news articles being discussed today and lo and behold, I came across an article on Black Moon.  

Black Moon – Use your imagination!

With that I decided to venture into another world and write a different type of post. Here goes:

One of the top news stories today is the fact that today, July 31, 2019 we will experience what is known as a Black Moon. So what is a Black Moon? Well we have heard of blood moon, full moon, quarter moon, maybe even a blue moon but how many of us have heard about a black moon?

According to what I have read, this phenomenon known as a “Black Moon” will be occurring again this evening in North America. The last time anyone recalled a “Black Moon” was in 2016. Now this phenomenon will only be seen in North America this evening. Sorry other parts of the world, you will have to wait until August 30 to catch your glimpse of a Black Moon.

But, here’s the thing, what does this even mean to us lowly humans. Is it important? First thing we need to learn is – “what in the world is a black moon?”

Supposedly a black moon is – are you ready for this – the second new moon of the month – yes, I said second new moon of the month, a rarity in and of itself. Let me provide a few more details but believe me when I say, I am definitely not an expert in this field. A black moon is similar to a Leap Year. As we know, a lunar cycle takes about 29 days to complete. Easy – right? Not true! Our months as we know are slightly longer with some being 30 days and others being 31. How does that old saying go when we wanted to remember which ones had 30 days and which had 31 days:

30 days has September, April, June, and November

All the rest have 31 except February which has 28

 So, using the theory mentioned above, sometimes, about every 32 months, we experience two full moons or as they have been referred to: New Moons. Taking it one step further, the second full moon in a month is called a blue moon while the second new moon is called a black moon.

Now remember my little diddy about remembering which months had 30 days versus those that had 31 days. Well,  guess which month has no new moons? If you guessed February, you would be correct because there are no new moons in February because of its few days (remember there are only 28 days in February except for the Leap Year which has 29 days). Supposedly this is less common than the other type of black moon and only occurs about once a decade.

Now before you set your alarm clock to go out tonight and see the black moon, let me burst your bubble ahead of time. Chances are that you will not see anything because, well, a black moon is nothing other than a new moon. So, what’s the big fuss about – well it is the second new moon of the month. This new moon will probably blend in with the sky so well, you may not even see the moon. And that is a shame too because it is also supposed to be a supermoon which means that the moon will appear bigger than usual. Why, because it is closer to the Earth but again I mention, seeing that it’s a new moon, you still won’t be able to really see it. 

And therein lies your science lesson for today or consider it a lesson in Selenology (in Greek, our moon is named “Selene,” as is the moon goddess of ancient Greek mythology. The English word “selenology,” or the study of the moon’s geology, derives from it). Hopefully I will be able to come up with something more comical to write about next week.

But, at least it wasn’t all bad news. Not comical, but not tragic either.

Until next time!

The Good Old Days!

59 Pontiac

Did you ever dread the day when someone would stop and ask what life was like back in our day – you know the time frame I am referring to but they don’t actually come out and say it – “back in the Dark Ages of your childhood!”  One would think that we didn’t have air, dirt, and water back then and that we had to fend off dinosaurs and pterodactyls – you know those prehistoric flying animals. In reality some might say that pterodactyls never actually existed. But that is not the subject of my rambling today.

Some might think that being individuals born in the 40s, we should all be gone by now, and seeing that we are not, we should be marveling at some of our modern wonders – you know what I am talking about – driverless cars, machines that clean our houses for us without our even asking it to (just by programming it ahead of time), and being able to see and talk to people with our watch – anyone remember the imaginary policeman’s fictional gizmo, the two-way wrist radio in 1946 worn by none other than Dick Tracy.

Is it any wonder why we might refer to those younger than us as young whippersnappers because they cannot remember much of the things that happened in our day!  You know the days I am talking about.

I am talking about when I used to wear high-top sneakers and doing so was not considered cool. Especially when one had to wear them to the school dance with a suit that I would not want to even be buried in today. Talk about embarrassing moments!

Back in the day, we could get a whole handful of candy for five-cents – you know, Mary Janes, Tootsie rolls (back then we only had one flavor tootsie rolls), and Root Beer barrels. Girls wore saddle shoes. Ask a girl what they are today and they will probably say: “Are they worn when one goes horseback riding?” Both our shoes and our clothing lasted a long time and believe it or not, should any of the clothing have holes in it, it was due to wear and tear over the years the item was worn. Our parents would not even think of buying clothing that already had holes in them

As a family, we were expected to eat all three meals together and breakfast usually consisted of runny oatmeal. We did not sit at the breakfast table eating breakfast while reading about athletes or missing children on a box of cereal. Or like today’s children do – noses in some high-tech gadget.

The rule was you ate what was being served to you and if you didn’t like it – well, you would have to wait until lunch to eat again and hopefully it would be something you liked because that same rule held for all three meals. If it was put in front of you – you ate it or you went hungry until the next mealtime. There was no luxury of eating chips, crackers, candy, or soda because such things were not kept in the house. And coming from a family of eight children, one learned real quick – you had better eat whatever was being served because (1) it would be hours before your next meal and (2) chances were that there would be no leftovers.

Both my parents loved coffee and I can remember when I asked if I could have a cup with my dinner one night. The response was: ‘No, you’ll stunt your growth.’ Seeing that I only grew to 5 feet 3 inches, I guess two things must have happened – one – I managed to drink some coffee when they were not looking and two – their comments must have been true.

Several rules applied at the dinner table or whenever we were all together eating – one was that tipping one’s chair back on the back two legs was a no-no, another was that no elbows were allowed on the table, and third – we had to eat all our vegetables or we didn’t get dessert. Hmmm, what was I thinking when I wrote this third rule – what is dessert? Ah, the good old days!