Hiatus

Going to take a short hiatus from blogging to clear my cluttered mind.

But before I go remember this horse quote:

“If you climb in the saddle, be ready for the ride!”

I need a fresh perspective as to what I want to share with y’all in the future so as to keep this blog material interesting, comical, and well, let’s face it, material that keeps you all coming back to read my ramblings.

Y’all stay safe and happy until I return.

Deadlines

Oops – looks like I missed my own deadline again. I should have posted this Sunday and here it is Tuesday already.

What can I say it has been that type of a week!

It’s been like a crazy house around here lately – see what I mean!

Oh well, I guess I will just settle in at my Happy Place.   

Or maybe I will just sit back and read a magazine, book, or paper (See picture below). What am I thinking – that’s not a magazine, book, or a paper – it’s a picture of a towel folded as a person reading the daily activities from a cruise, we took several years ago? Can this day get any worse?

How does that old Horse saying go: “If you climb in the saddle, be ready for the ride.” 

Well – as yet another old saying goes: “At least I showed up!”

And seeing that I promised to write at least weekly – what you see is what you get!

I will end this post with the words of Confucius:

It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop! I will try to do better next week.

Until next time! Y’all come back now, ya hear!

Balance

I find myself trying to stay more balanced today than I ever have. Writing this blog once a week assists me in that endeavor what with this wild and mixed-up world we are living in today. What does it mean to find balance – well – there are all types of balance so let’s be specific here – finding balance in life!

We all know by now that finding balance in life should help us improve our overall health. Why’s that? Because when we have balance, we should have time to pay attention to many of our body’s needs. Finding balance in life helps us improve our overall health. Having balance enables us to have time to pay attention to various things that are good for us even though we shudder at the sound of some of the words I am about to mention. You know, words like diet, exercise, and if we are really into it, even meditation. Let’s face it, being honest, leastways for me, when I don’t prioritize those items, I find myself regretting not doing them. When’s that you say? When I find myself putting on weight, not being able to bend over to tie my shoes without huffing and puffing, and so forth and so on. In other words, by not taking time to take care of myself, I am not in balance.

Thankfully I am somewhat in balance (I know many of you are thinking about some of the wild and crazy things I post here – and are probably saying to yourselves – him – he is far from balanced), but I am sort of balanced.

What can I say – as Steve Martin would say:

“I am a wild and crazy guy!”

Okay, enough about balance – bottom line is no matter what age we are and in what stage of life we are in – we should seek to stay in balance. Enough for the philosophy lesson. Let’s move on to some other important information.

Did you know that in 30 days Summer officially begins?

Think about that – in June, just 10 days away, the June solstice occurs will occur on Tuesday June 21, marking the first day of summer? Seeing that we here in Central Florida have already experienced temperatures in the mid-90s, I am beginning to wonder what our summer temperatures might be. So, what is the summer solstice? Well, for one thing it will be the longest day of the year. 

Why do I know that you ask? Well, in the Northern Hemisphere, that’s where we reside as does all the United States, the June solstice or as some people would like to call it, the summer solstice occurs when the Sun (you know that bright big ball in the sky) travels along its northernmost path in the sky. And if you haven’t figured it out yet, the southern hemisphere begins to experience the astronomical start of winter because the Sun is at its lowest point in the sky. Meaning places like Australia, New Zealand, Brazil, to name a few would be experiencing their winters. 

If you will recall, June 21 is referred to as the longest day and shortest night of the calendar year. By longest, I am referring to the longest period of sunlight hours are experienced on this day. And if it is known as the longest day, it stands to reason, we also experience the shortest night on this date too.

What other tidbits of information might I share with you before I go off on some wild and crazy thought, idea, or what have you.

Oh, today (May 22) is also considered to be National Maritime Day. Yup, way back in 1933, Congress designated May 22 as National Maritime Day. It took quite a long time to get that designation. Why do I say that? Well, the “first successful transoceanic voyage under steam propulsion” began back on May 22, 1819, when the steamship S.S. Savannah set sail from Savannah, Georgia. Where did it go, you ask? Why all the way to Liverpool, England. It only took it 30 days to do it because it arrived on June 20. So, what do we celebrate May 22? Well, this day honors both past and present contributions of the U.S. merchant marine during both peace and war.  

Okay, time to slip in one of my wild and crazy questions that may or may not make you smile or chuckle. Here goes,

“What did Mama Tomato say to Baby Tomato when he lagged behind?” Ketchup!

I know, I need new material.

What else is this day famous for – well did you know that on this day in 1859, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle – you know the author who penned many stories about the detective Sherlock Holmes – was born. Who knew?

What else can I share with you this week. Let’s see – did you know:

Coffee is break fluid!

Okay, time to share a brain teaser with you:

Charles Chaplin’s chaplain chided Charlie constantly concerning Chaplin’s cow-like chewing. How many C’s are there in all?

Oh, and to end this week’s post, let me just say that:

Evolution is nature’s way of trying to cover its mistakes!

That’s it folks, that’s all I have. Hope you enjoyed this week’s post.

Until next time. Y’all come back now, ya hear!

Better Half

Well, where did that week go? Lately it seems as though Saturday slips up on me faster than it used to. So, what do I share with you this week?

Seeing that we are celebrating our wedding anniversary of 59 years this week, I thought it might be appropriate to share a bit of trivia with y’all relating to wedded bliss. Ever wonder where the term “Better Half” comes from?

The reality of the saying is that it is a tale from the Middle East. Yes, believe it or not, as I understand it, the origin of the modern spouse’s humility when introducing his mate as his “better half” came from a tear-jerking tale out of the Middle East.

As the story goes – a Bedouin had offended his prince and as was the way things were back then, the husband was to be put to death.

But, as luck would have it, the Bedouin’s wife truly loved him and pleaded for her spouse’s life by saying something that goes like the following:

“O great Prince, the blasphemy is horrible, I confess.

But it is not my whole husband who has thus rendered himself guilty towards Thee.”

“Not thy whole husband,” the Prince replied.

“Nay,” she continued, “it is but half, the half of him that has committed the insult; for am I not the other half, I who have never offended Thee?” Now the guilty half places itself under the protection of the innocent half and the latter cannot suffer the former to be punished.”

What are we to make of this – well, just this – it would appear that from this ancient concept of a man and woman being merged into one by marriage comes our phrase “better half.”

Don’t you feel so much smarter now.

Comical trivia:

Did you know that only Robinson Crusoe could have everything done by Friday.

Did you know that pigs are full of balony?

Seeing that I have this thing about writing – did you know that:

An editor makes a long story short.

Okay, as you can see, words aren’t coming to me like they should be so here is a quote or two before I leave you for this week:

“If you stumble, make it part of the dance.”

“In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back.”

Charles Schulz

And if you don’t remember anything about this week’s blog, remember this:

“Life is like an ice cream. Enjoy it before it melts.”

Until next time! Y’all take care now, ya hear!

Wild and Crazy Guy!

With today being Mother’s Day, I thought I would create a post involving mothers and some of the dumb things that happen over the years as they raise their children. Then I will move on to some more ridiculous stuff because I am just a wild and crazy guy.

My guess is that mothers know more about weird accidents because over their child-rearing years I am sure that most accidents that happen with children border on the ridiculous. If you stop and think about it, our children never seem to do things in a conventional manner. Think about it – kids stuffing pennies up their nose, catch their arms in weird places or sticking their heads through fences, or get their hand literally stuck in the cookie jar.

Think back to when you were raising your children and they got into some weird type of accident – first few words out of your mouth were probably: “How in the world could something like this happen?” But, as parents, we learn to accept the fact that strange things do in fact happen. As a matter of fact, Dolly has this favorite saying which is: “If it is weird, it will happen to us!”

It gets to the point that when something strange does happen, we just prepare ourselves accordingly. All we end up doing is defend ourselves as we ride to the emergency room when and if the accident does happen.

Can you see it or hear it now? “How did your daughter break her arm?”

“Falling out of her tree house!”

“Your daughter has her own tree house?”

“Doesn’t yours?”

Picture it now – while waiting for your child to be taken in to see the doctor on call at the Emergency Room of the hospital, the nurse attempts to jam the following statement “Child fell out of her tree house” onto the short blank provided on the insurance paperwork they had to complete.

Or here is one for you – “Patient cut his tongue while hiding a G.I. Joe soldier in his mouth that his brother needed to complete his army battlefield just to aggravate him. And this is just a brief sampling of the probable statement’s nurses attempt to write in the short spaces allowed on insurance claims forms.

Speaking of accidents – have you ever thought about ridiculous accidents that you have heard about over the years? Take the one where a guy was out shopping for groceries and was reaching into one of those freezers where you must bend over as far as you can to get the leaf spinach that is on sale – you know – the BOGO – buy one and get one free. Why do they make those freezers so deep anyways?  Anyways as this guy was bending over – he was short you know – like me – he bent too far over and lost his balance and fell headfirst into the freezer.

Another guy happened to be walking by and being a big guy, grabbed the other guy – you know the guy hanging onto two boxes of frozen spinach with ankles shooting straight up in the air, dragged him out and decided they had best go to the hospital to have him looked at, treated if necessary, and hopefully released.

Chances are that falling into the freezer was the easy part. My educated guess is that the real trauma came later when the guy had to answer all the questions posed by the people who create the insurance forms he had to complete. Can you see it now or should I say can you picture the type of questions that might have come up?

Was this an accident?  While the guy really wanted to answer – no – I always go freezer diving for several boxes of spinach! Being the gentleman he is, he merely replies: Yes

Wanting to cover all the bases, the next question asks: “Was there any other way to get the spinach out of the case?”

Thinking about this for a moment, the guy recalls a tall gentleman on the opposite side of the freezer he could have asked to bend over and reach the spinach, but you know us ‘macho’ guys, didn’t want to embarrass himself by asking for help. So, he merely responds by saying: “Probably”

Then the adjuster asks the question: “Have you gotten the spinach out of this case like this before?”

Knowing that he has – he replies: “Many times, but most of those times, the freezer wasn’t almost empty.”

Okay, moving on and thinking about the numerous road trips we have taken over the years and my need to use the bathrooms whether on a train or a bus, I can just see the face of the individual that would have had to fill out the claims form had I had an accident while in the bathroom on the bus.  

The report would read: “individual had his buttocks lodged in an emergency exit window when, while in the rest room of a bus – the bus swerved, forcing him into the window.”

I can picture the staff asking me at the hospital, “Was this your assigned seat?”

What can I say – I told you I am a wild and crazy guy!

Until next time! Y’all come back now, ya hear!