The Outhouse

Hi All:

Been on sort of a hiatus from writing and believe it or not – when I stop and think about it – it has been my writing this blog post along with the quips I used to write (another thing I must get back to) that has kept me sane in these wild and crazy times. With that thought in mind, being gone as long as I have, I got to thinking what is it I could share with you folks that would (1) get me back in the writing habit and (2) hopefully get a chuckle from those of you taking the time to read my “old fart dribble!”

Enter the task of researching and creating this post which is based on some material I came across that was stuck in an old writing folder. I only hope it will bring a smile to your faces.

It is good to be back and hopefully I will get back to posting at least once a week as I used to do.

Stay safe and I hope you enjoy.

The Outhouse!

Ma and Pa were two hillbillies living in West Virginia out on a farm up in the hills.

Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full. He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn’t know what to do to empty the hole.

Ma says, “Why don’t you ask the young’n down the road? He must be smart ‘cause he’s a college gradjyate.”

So Pa drives down to the neighbor’s house and asks him, “Mr. College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don’t know what to do to empty it.”

The young’n tells him, “Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time. The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it’s in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground. The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.”

Pa thanks the neighbor, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.

He goes home and puts them under the outhouse. He then lights them and runs behind a tree. All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse!

Boom!! Off goes the first stick of dynamite …   shooting the outhouse into the air.

Boom!! Off goes the second stick of dynamite … spreading poop all over the farm.

Wham! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole …

Pa races to the outhouse, throws open the door and asks, “Ma, are you all right??!!”

As she pulls up her panties she says …

“Yeah, but I’m sure glad I didn’t fart in the kitchen!”